The Gladiator by Alan Baker

Author:Alan Baker [ALAN BAKER]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Da Capo Press
Published: 2012-01-27T05:00:00+00:00

Suetonius provides the answer to this apparently lunatic behaviour: the astrologer Thrasyllus had previously eased the worries of Tiberius by claiming that Caligula had no more chance of becoming Emperor than of crossing the bay of Baiae on horseback. Caligula had already proved that prophesy false by becoming Emperor; but he wanted to refute it a second time by actually performing the feat Thrasyllus had considered to be of equal unlikelihood.

Suetonius does not restrain himself in giving examples of Caligula’s rather dubious sense of humour, which almost invariably involved a good deal of suffering for someone. For instance, during gladiatorial shows he would order that the canopies that provided shelter from the fierce heat of the sun be removed, and then forbid anyone to leave the amphitheatre. The people then had a simple choice: swelter or die. He was also fond of pitting ageing, weak former gladiators against decrepit wild animals. Even more disturbingly, he staged comic duels between members of respectable families who suffered from various physical disabilities. On more than one occasion, he closed down the granaries and let the people go hungry.

His sexual exploits are, of course, legendary. He was accused of being both an active and passive homosexual, both with people of Rome and foreign hostages. ‘Moreover,’ writes Suetonius, ‘a young man of consular family, Valerius Catullus, revealed publicly that he had buggered the Emperor, and quite worn himself out in the process.’ He committed incest with his sisters, conducted an affair with a prostitute named Pyrallis, and made sexual advances to almost every respectable woman in Rome. His method of seduction was straightforward to say the least: he would invite a selection of women to dinner (with their husbands) and then, as each passed his couch, he would examine them at his leisure, ‘as a purchaser might assess the value of a slave’. When he had decided on his favourite, Caligula would then leave the banquet with her, and would return later. As an added mortification to these unfortunate women (and as an added insult to the powerless husbands), he would describe in considerable detail not only their physical attributes, good and bad, but also their sexual performance. On certain occasions, he would even issue divorces in their husbands’ names.

According to Suetonius, Caligula:

practised many other various arts as well, most enthusiastically, too. He made appearances as a Thracian gladiator, as a singer, as a dancer, fought with real weapons, and drove chariots in many circuses in a number of places. Indeed, he was so proud of his voice and his dancing that he could not resist the temptation of supporting the tragic actors at public performances, and would repeat their gestures by way of praise or criticism.

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